ten phases of a woman’s life
November 1, 2009
michelangelo - delphic sibyl
The Ten Phases of a Woman’s Life
. A little list I found tucked in the back of a little book by Joan Anderson (The Second Journey) that I haven’t actually read yet….but this caught my eye and I loved it. It’s a list of the phases women go through on their journey to themselves. It helps to explain the restlessness, aching and tugging going on inside during these last years. And it helps me feel a bit less alone – maybe I’m not such a loser freak, after all. Maybe there are other women out there who have had life-altering events slamming into them like the waves of a tsunami. Maybe I’m not the only one reeling from a reversal of all I thought I knew and a new and sudden “knowing” of a completely different reality. After so long of feeling that I was pushing through uncharted areas, lately I’ve begun to be reminded that I’m not alone at all. There are myriads of women, past and present, who have trod this path before. I just don’t have them with me in the flesh. But I read their words, in books and blogs. (like here, here and here, to start) And, like this list, they give me hope and fresh purpose.
michelangelo - libyan sibyl
- 0-7 childlike wonder
- 7-14 the beginning of hormonal activity
- 14-21 unfurling sexuality
- 21-28 being affirmed by a man-the desire to procreate
- 28-35 birthing, mothering, caretaking, putting others first
- 35-42 leaving self out but occasionally looking beyond
- 42-49 menopause approaching – is this all? a desire for self-love
- 49-56 birthing of a mature psyche – a desire to go away, live without rules and become more instinctive
- 56-63 choosing one’s true purpose, work, vocation, finding one’s individual reason for being beyond the roles
- 63-70 reflection – becoming the watchwoman, recasting all that one has learned, being whatever one has become
michelangelo - cumaean sibyl
This is wonderful, Twila. I think that Joan Borysenko in “The Woman’s Book of Life” offers something similar. I had to laugh when I read this, because I seem to be living this verbatim! Up until 55, I chose a new lifestyle that allowed me to move away from the duties and pressures of life to go inward. Then I turned 56 this summer and something very big shifted in me. I couldn’t quite name it, but this helps. It explains all the passion and energy I am feeling about supporting other women. Though I have been doing this since ‘94, now it feels like a raging inferno. (Menopause contributes!) So firey, in fact, that yesterday my husband (who is amazingly supportive) told me he couldn’t quite handle all this energy. (LOL)
I wonder where YOU find yourself?
And, I hope you don’t mind, but I love this post enough I’d like to refer to it on mine today. Maybe you will have some new visitors!
I loved this list because it gave me hope that I’m not too far behind in the game! In fact, according to the list, I’m right on schedule! I’m 53 and getting ready to start back to college after 20 years. I took one year in my early 30s. To say I’m terrified would be an understatement! But excited, too. And the desire to go away, live without rules and become more instinctive? Right on the money!
HI again,
I don’t think we ever too far behind, Twila. I am sure you are exactly where you are supposed to be. (wink) How exciting that you are going back to college! I wish the best with this. How wonderful that you can afford the opportunity to do so. Enjoy!
I’ve posted at my blog and hope you will check it out. It is based on your post here.
Thank you again for such a thought-provoking piece.
Hi Twila – yes, looks like I fit my age category – except the live without rules…not too sure of that…too broad a statement for me.