When we can be secure in our inner source for true happiness, we don’t expose ourselves to the devastation that comes when outside hopes for happiness and security are dashed. We have our shelter, our place of security, inside. And we needn’t be afraid that this is an escapist shelter. When the basis of our well-being is firm within, we can act with true courage and compassion for others, for we’re coming from a solid position of calmness and strength.
~ Thanissaro Bhikkhu
picture from the edge of the known universe
When your vision has gone
no part of the world can find you.
Time to go into the dark
where the night has eyes
to recognize its own.
There you can be sure
you are not beyond love.
The dark will be your womb
tonight.
The night will give you a horizon
further than you can see.
You must learn one thing.
The world was made to be free in.
Give up all the other worlds
except the one to which you belong.
Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet
confinement of your aloneness
to learn
anything or anyone
that does not bring your alive
is too small for you.
David Whyte
throw roses into the abyss and say: ‘here is my thanks to the monster who didn’t succeed in swallowing me alive.’ ~ friedrich nietzche
mara friedman
I Confess
by
Alison Luterman
I stalked her
in the grocery store: her crown
of snowy braids held in place by a great silver clip,
her erect bearing, radiating tenderness,
watching
the way she placed yogurt and avocados in her
basket,
beaming peace like the North Star.
I wanted to ask, “What aisle did you find
your serenity in, do you know
how to be married for fifty years or how to live
alone,
excuse me for interrupting, but you seem to
possess
some knowledge that makes the earth turn and
burn on its axis—”
But we don’t request such things from strangers
nowadays. So I said, “I love your hair.”
Mindfulness, meditation and study are the main things I do right now to develop ethically, spiritually and emotionally. They are what I do to live a more engaged life, to be more in the present, to be more sane. The result of a simple meditation practice is phenomenal. Mindfulness, while more complex is similar in that I start where I am, right now. It is also like meditation in that it is simple, but not easy.
There are many ways to become more mindful, a smorgasboard of ways to become more alert and aware and in the moment. Some simple, some taking more time and commitment. Some I try for a bit and abandon and some I return to again and again. Thich Nhat Hanh has written these 5 mindfulness trainings as a way to live more mindfully. Reading one of them a day, reflecting on it throughout the day, is one I have found particularily lovely. Here they are:
Reverence For Life Aware of the suffering caused by the destruction of life, I am committed to cultivating the insight of interbeing and compassion and learning ways to protect the lives of people, animals, plants, and minerals. I am determined not to kill, not to let others kill, and not to support any act of killing in the world, in my thinking, or in my way of life. Seeing that harmful actions arise from anger, fear, greed, and intolerance, which in turn come from dualistic and discriminative thinking, I will cultivate openness, non-discrimination, and non-attachment to views in order to transform violence, fanaticism, and dogmatism in myself and in the world.
True Happiness Aware of the suffering caused by exploitation, social injustice, stealing, and oppression, I am committed to practicing generosity in my thinking, speaking, and acting. I am determined not to steal and not to possess anything that should belong to others; and I will share my time, energy, and material resources with those who are in need. I will practice looking deeply to see that the happiness and suffering of others are not separate from my own happiness and suffering; that true happiness is not possible without understanding and compassion; and that running after wealth, fame, power and sensual pleasures can bring much suffering and despair. I am aware that happiness depends on my mental attitude and not on external conditions, and that I can live happily in the present moment simply by remembering that I already have more than enough conditions to be happy. I am committed to practicing Right Livelihood so that I can help reduce the suffering of living beings on Earth and reverse the process of global warming.
True Love Aware of the suffering caused by sexual misconduct, I am committed to cultivating responsibility and learning ways to protect the safety and integrity of individuals, couples, families, and society. Knowing that sexual desire is not love, and that sexual activity motivated by craving always harms myself as well as others, I am determined not to engage in sexual relations without true love and a deep, long-term commitment made known to my family and friends. I will do everything in my power to protect children from sexual abuse and to prevent couples and families from being broken by sexual misconduct. Seeing that body and mind are one, I am committed to learning appropriate ways to take care of my sexual energy and cultivating loving kindness, compassion, joy and inclusiveness – which are the four basic elements of true love – for my greater happiness and the greater happiness of others. Practicing true love, we know that we will continue beautifully into the future.
Loving Speech and Deep Listening Aware of the suffering caused by unmindful speech and the inability to listen to others, I am committed to cultivating loving speech and compassionate listening in order to relieve suffering and to promote reconciliation and peace in myself and among other people, ethnic and religious groups, and nations. Knowing that words can create happiness or suffering, I am committed to speaking truthfully using words that inspire confidence, joy, and hope. When anger is manifesting in me, I am determined not to speak. I will practice mindful breathing and walking in order to recognize and to look deeply into my anger. I know that the roots of anger can be found in my wrong perceptions and lack of understanding of the suffering in myself and in the other person. I will speak and listen in a way that can help myself and the other person to transform suffering and see the way out of difficult situations. I am determined not to spread news that I do not know to be certain and not to utter words that can cause division or discord. I will practice Right Diligence to nourish my capacity for understanding, love, joy, and inclusiveness, and gradually transform anger, violence, and fear that lie deep in my consciousness.
Nourishment and Healing Aware of the suffering caused by unmindful consumption, I am committed to cultivating good health, both physical and mental, for myself, my family, and my society by practicing mindful eating, drinking, and consuming. I will practice looking deeply into how I consume the Four Kinds of Nutriments, namely edible foods, sense impressions, volition, and consciousness. I am determined not to gamble, or to use alcohol, drugs, or any other products which contain toxins, such as certain websites, electronic games, TV programs, films, magazines, books, and conversations. I will practice coming back to the present moment to be in touch with the refreshing, healing and nourishing elements in me and around me, not letting regrets and sorrow drag me back into the past nor letting anxieties, fear, or craving pull me out of the present moment. I am determined not to try to cover up loneliness, anxiety, or other suffering by losing myself in consumption. I will contemplate interbeing and consume in a way that preserves peace, joy, and well-being in my body and consciousness, and in the collective body and consciousness of my family, my society and the Earth.
penny hardy
I’m frozen. Can’t move. Can’t see the way to go. The ground keeps disappearing. Again and again. Just when I get my balance, just when I find my stride, I trip and stumble and the ground is gone again.
I don’t want to make this pretty.
I’m tired of trying to figure it all out.
There are no real answers. Only the questions. But how to live in the questions? I falter, I stumble, I spin in circles, grasping thin air. Was this what I was training for as a child when I spun until I lost balance, lost control? When all I could do was give in to the vertigo and fall?
But lying in the grass, watching the sky spin around me, I would feel a sense of something more. Something outside my experience, something outside my understanding and control. Lying on that same grass at night, with the blackness all around me and the stars like living, breathing things, I would wonder at the aching in my chest. What is it? What are the fireflies flickering all around me telling me? I would climb the strong old tree and feel some sense of communion, unspoken but somehow understood by my child’s heart.
And the wind. When the wind would blow, when I would stand and close my eyes and feel the wind moving over me, through me, I would strain to hear the whispering call, to what I couldn’t name. But I would answer, I would travel with the wind and I would be soothed. And even now, even now, when I am at my most desperate, when my hold on living seems to be slipping, I hear these words in my deepest heart, “remember the wind”. And I breathe another breath. And I get up from the grass and stretch my arms to the stars and I take one more step. And I wait for another day, another dawn, another step. I listen for the wind. I open my heart to life.
“I beg you…to have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms of books written in a very foreign language. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer…” ~ Rainer Maria Rilke
What would it take for my life to be richer, more peaceful, happier? After thinking about this for a few moments, I wrote down my blueprint for happiness – the things that I have the power to do that would enrich and deepen my life:
This is all it would take for my life to feel rich and meaningful. None of these things cost money. None of them are hard to accomplish. None out of my reach physically or mentally. Time to dive in!
“I would like to do
whatever it is
that presses the essence
from the hour.”
~Mary Oliver
